5 bands that DON'T live up to their awesome superhero names

Mon, 05/10/09 - 11:45AM | Filed in lists by rogan josh | Views: 1884 | Comments: 2

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Photo Marvel

Uncle Ben said that with great power comes great responsibility. Which despite making Peter Parker's personal life a little bit shit, is probably true. See, the only reason we're journalists is because we're not super strong and able to climb walls.

So when you pick a name of a superhero for your band, you do feel you have to live up to the name somehow. For instance: supergroup Castles, which whether or not named after Frank Castle aka The Punisher, are hard enough to suit the latter's brand of badassery. Well, not quite, since no one can, but they do come close. But do these dudes and dudettes below live up to the name?

WOLVERINE

Swedish prog metal band who are at least loud enough for Logan, but this is the kind of thing you imagine Colossus listening to in his downtime. Given the flannel and lumberjack jackets, you would peg Wolverine as more of an alt country type.

 

POLARIS

There are at least two Polarises: the first is the Mark Mulcahy one, which played the legendary theme song of The Adventures Of Pete & Pete, and the other are that new, genre-less Malaysian band with the really long song titles. In this case, there isn't much superhero to live up to: despite having green hair and being Magneto's daughter, her character's main claim to fame is being Havok's lover. Meh.

 

THE TOXIC AVENGER

It's harder than you think to live up to a toxically-disfigured janitor whose main weapon of choice is a mop. But the Frenchie succeeds.

 

MAGNETO

No, no, and fuck no. You cannot take the baddest of badasses and reduce him to a Mexican boy band.

 

UNCANNY X-MEN

Aussie band from the 80s. It would be impossible for anyone to live up to this name, but the Uncanny X-Men almost succeed since Rogue, Dazzler, Longshot, Nightcrawler and occasionally Storm rocked puffy mullets in the most glorious of decades.

 

Also read:
Top 12 appropriate Transformers theme songs

Singapore Toy, Games & Comic Convention @ Suntec, SG, 14-16 Aug
An extra 25 minutes of Watchmen

Related Tags: lists, comics, wtf, superhero, band, video
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2 comments
Engels_thumb

There's Toxic Avenger the movie, and then there's Toxic Crusaders cartoon based on the movie

Posted by trujillo on 06 October | Send private message
Default_user

wasn't it called toxic crusaders?

Posted by iffy on 05 October

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